Will the mediator persuade us to get back together?
No. Mediation is for people whose
relationship is over and who feel they would like some help in making decisions
about arrangements for their children. People who would like to try to repair
their relationship can be offered Relationship Counselling with one of our
Counsellors.
Will the mediator make a decision on what we should do?
Decisions are for you as clients
to make, but the mediator will help you do this by helping you identify and
discuss the issues which are important for each of you.
Will we be left in a room together?
You will never be left alone. The
safety of clients and mediators is taken very seriously. Mediators understand
that these sessions can be stressful, particularly if clients haven’t met each
other for some time, and separate arrival and departure times can also be
arranged.
My ‘ex’ has a new partner. Will they be coming along?
Mediation is principally for
parents however, in some circumstances other people closely involved with your
children e.g. grandparents and step-parents may become involved.
Can I bring my children to meetings?
No, unless it has been agreed by
everyone involved that they have to be consulted. You have to be able to speak
freely and so we feel that it isn’t appropriate for children to be present.
Children can also be disruptive and divert your attention, as well as that of
the mediator. If you explain your child care arrangements to us we will try our
best to offer you appointments to suit. If you arrive with children, your
meeting will be postponed until a later date.
What about my children’s views?
Parents and other family members
who the child trusts, are often the best people to ascertain children’s views.
However, we do operate a Hearing Children’s
Views service. Which your mediator can discuss in depth with you.
Can we discuss financial or property matters?
At Family Mediation Borders we
focus on making arrangements for children, but we can refer you to another
service which deals with financial and property issues.
Is there a long waiting list?
There are exceptions, for example
during holiday times, but you can usually get an appointment within two weeks.
Will the mediator I see be properly qualified?
All mediators are fully qualified
professional family mediation practitioners. They are registered with Family
Mediation Scotland and members of the UK College of Family Mediators.
How much does it cost?
This service is free. However,
contributions, no matter how small, are always welcome.
Is there a long waiting list?
There are exceptions, for example
during holiday times, but you can usually get an initial appointment within two
weeks.
Will the person who sees my children be properly qualified?
We only use fully qualified
professional family mediation practitioners who are Disclosure checked and
Registered with Family Mediation Scotland and the UK College of Family
Mediators. These people have a wealth of experience helping separated families
and have been specifically trained to speak with children.
How much does it cost?
This service is free. However, contributions, no matter how small, are always welcome.
Is there a long waiting list?
There are important procedures
that we need to follow to ensure your child’s safety and that of other children,
as well as undertaking preparations to make the time your family spends at the
Centres as comfortable and straightforward as possible. We recognise that often
children and other visiting family members would like contact to begin as soon
as possible and we do our utmost to make arrangements for you as quickly as we
can. You can normally expect contact to be offered within two weeks of Advice &
Support sessions being completed.
Can I bring someone with me?
Generally no. However, with
advance notice and if everyone agrees, including the duty Contact Centre
Organiser (CCO), sometimes we can allow extra visitors to attend the Centre and
meet with the child. If you turn up at the Centre with someone we were not
expecting, they will not be admitted.
Can I bring presents for the child?
It is always better to get
agreement in advance so we advise you to call us a few days before the Contact.
However, if you arrive with a gift, you can ask the duty CCO to put your request
to the resident parent.
Can I take photographs and videos?
Videos or sound recordings are
not permitted but photographs, using a regular camera are allowed. You must be
careful not to include any other children in photos you take. If staff suspect
that this has happened they will ask you to destroy the film or delete the
digital image. You can not use mobile phones to take photos as these must be
switched off while you are in the Centre. Contact Centre staff will not take
photos for you.
Will anyone write reports about the contact?
Family mediation staff do not
provide reports of Supported Contact to anyone else. However, we can admit
Social Work staff or Court Reporters, if a report is required. However, that
would not happen without your knowledge. If you feel that it is important that
Reports are provided to the courts or Social Work, then you may wish to consider
our Supervised Contact Service.
How much does it cost?
This service is free. However,
contributions, no matter how small, are always welcome.
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